Uh, I'm sorry, I really think this is not enough background information. Sure, not following through to her end of the deal automatically puts her in the bad spot, but a less evasive report of what you said in that IRC channel may change the reader's perspective quite a bit. I think you need to come forward in a more honest way, and tell people what exactly you said, or a vague rephrasing of it, because personally, I don't feel like I can judge anything until I hear what happened for real. And your hesitating attitude on the matter, I'm sorry, doesn't help.

A quick question to the mods goes as an afterthought: did you change the layout of the comment pages after the last changes in Lj's layout? Not to complain or anything, but this one kind of hurts my eyes a little.