refund advice

[fenrirs-child.livejournal.com]

 Ok, so I have a few weird situations, but they all involve refunds. I took a few commissions for some footpaws, and after finishing one, I realized how badly I was underselling myself, and refunded all but one person, who is local and will not respond to me at all. I took cash as payment, and have no address to refund to, and she has repeatedly ignored my offers for a refund. I have another local who commissioned me for a fullsuit, but due to some drama with a third party (if you really feel it's relevant I'll elaborate) he decided to cancel his commission. My TOS states that deposits are non-refundable, but anything past the deposit is. He's paid me $100 past the deposit, but once again, he paid in cash, and I have no address to send a refund to, and he's not answering my messages asking to meet to refund him. 

 

My question is, how long should I hold their refunds for? It's been months with the first one, and it's getting close to that with the second... Is there some sort of etiquette for this kind of thing? I don't want to rip anyone off, but I'm not a bank either...  

EDIT: I sent them both notes and an email to the one I could send an email to, and screencapped them. Also updated my TOS 

EDIT 2: finally got in contact with the first person and tendered refund!