Date: 2014-06-22 08:37 am (UTC)
I can;t do refunds because I'm flat -broke-.

You should never be "flat broke" when it comes to refunding, because that money should be sitting in your account, unspent, until the work is complete.

Telling commissioners to pay your paypal fees, or to send payment as a gift to avoid them is against Paypal's TOS, and can get your account shut down. You need to factor the fees into your prices, or eat them, but never pass them directly on to your customer.
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